kobetyrant:

teacher: hello! your child has been very insubordinate in class! causing disruption throughout the whole period-

me as a parent: ??? receipts :)


“Before you speak, ask yourself, is it kind, is it necessary, is it true, does it improve on the silence?” — Sai Baba  (via stayinflyyy)


monica-geller:

*sees a cute guy on public transport*
*makes brief accidental eye contact*
*goes home and listens to enchanted on repeat for 3 hours*


witchcraft-y:

this gives me life and inspires me to step up my lipstick game


artemisfowlstolemysoul:

ms-marauder-inlove:

fappuclno:

GOD IT WAS LIKE I WAS SCROLLING THROUGH HELL

the little infinity

whY THE FUCK


afriiican:

*takes butt pic*
*admires butt pic*
Aight koo
*deletes butt pic*


unsmokable:

someone somewhere is meeting the love of their life right now and that’s pretty cool


  • white girl: i dont like this abandoned insane asylum, zack.
  • white boy: come on, amanda, 10 years ago tonight, the famous blood skull killer committed his last murder right here and then vanished.
  • white girl: you're just trying to scare me.
  • white boy: lmao
  •  they continue walking for a few seconds
  •  *white couple hears noise*
  • white girl: babe what that??
  • white boy: i'll go investigate
  •  *leaves her alone*
  •  *choking noises*
  • white girl: zack!!!
  • white boy: ha ha just kidding!
  • white girl: asshole!
  • white boy: im just playin babe
  • white girl: that wasnt funny but ur still cute
  •  *playful kiss*
  •  *things turn sexy*
  •  *hear noise*
  • white boy: i'll go investigate
  •  *he leaves and then there's a silence for a long time*
  •  *maybe a thud*
  • white girl: zack! this isnt funny anymore zack!
  •  *she walks and he dead*
  • white girl: ahhh!!
  •  *killer shows up with sickle or quirky weapon that distinguishes him from other horror movie villains*
  • white girl: ahhh!!!
  •  *white girl runs*
  •  *dead end*
  •  *hides*
  •  *thinks she free n safe*
  •  *guy catches her*
  •  *cuts her*
  •  *she dead*
  • opening title slashes across screen: BLOOD SLICE IN 3-D

chloesvertes:

Happy birthday to the lovely and talented Maddie Ziegler!